News 12 Connecticut's Frank Recchia opens up about mom's battle with Alzheimer's

News 12 Connecticut's Frank Recchia is sharing the story of his mother's battle with Alzheimer's disease in honor of Alzheimer's and Brain Awareness Month.

News 12 Staff

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Jun 30, 2020, 5:44 PM

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Updated 1,664 days ago

News 12 Connecticut's Frank Recchia is sharing the story of his mother's battle with Alzheimer's disease in honor of Alzheimer's and Brain Awareness Month.

Frank's mother, Patsy Recchia, was born in 1936 in Cincinnati, Ohio at the height of the Great Depression.

By the time Frank was born 32 years later in the 1960s, it was another period of unrest in the history of the United States.

As somebody who lived through tumultuous times, Frank says his mother was always on a journey to find her quiet place. And she did find that place in her books, as she's a great reader, Frank says.

However, when she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease a few years ago, Frank says her pursuit for a quiet place was violently disrupted.

"That quiet place was disrupted like a bomb going off," Frank says.

Frank says since his mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, he hasn't gone to a movie, gone on vacation, and his life has been nothing but going to work every day, coming home, and being a caregiver.

"You kind of lose yourself in the chaos of this care giving," he says.

"Treating Alzheimer's patients has been referred to as the long goodbye because you're very slowly letting go of the person you once knew and you're having to deal with a very childlike person who eventually becomes non-verbal, can't control their bowels, and who can't control their bladder. You have to deal with the physical mess, the emotional mess, and it's just one chaotic nightmare," Frank says.

Dr. Gary Blick is a doctor who has treated a lot of patients with neuro-cognitive decline going into Alzheimer's disease and dementia. Blick says he's known Patsy for many years, not only as her physician, but as a close friend of the family.

"It's been a wonderful experience to take care of her, because it really helped me eventually then to take care of my mom," Blick says.

Frank says he made a promise to his mother that he would not place her in a nursing home many times throughout her life.

"My mother, at many times throughout our lives, used to say to me, ‘you will not put me in a nursing home,’ and I would always promise her, and to me those promises weren't just words spoken. That was a sacred bond of trust," Frank says.

He admits at first he was depressed all the time because of the way the disease changed his mother.

"She became childlike, shouting, violent outbursts, screaming, impatience," he says.

However, Frank says he started to find that with the right care, and with the right amount of love, there are very tender moments where he could interact calmly, and peacefully.

"Those moments when you get a smile are so precious, and these are not years that I'll never get back. These are the most precious years of my life. This means everything to me."